Lori Bennett is an author and psychotherapist in private practice. Lori has been providing psychotherapy to adults for over 35 years and specializes in women's issues, grief, and emotional neglect.
Mother Load is the story of Pamela, a young woman who suffered emotional neglect in her relationship with her adoptive mother. Her therapist, Lily, supports Pamela as she works to overcome the aftereffects of her upbringing. Pamela eventually finds love―with the help of her long-lost family.
Pamela and Lily's lives become entwined in ways neither could have ever foreseen. Their separate journeys transform through their work together.
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Living in the past can create our futures. Yet, how do young people step out of their histories of neglect? How do they hope to feel loved if they never experienced the love they needed in their families of origin? How do they combat the damage to trust? How do they learn to stop the self-blame over circumstances, to move past the past, and embrace a new future?
These questions are answered in Dynamic Psychotherapy with Adult Survivors: Living Past Neglect, in the hope that other people will benefit from my clients' experiences with healing. First, I have asked them to describe what their lives were like prior to therapy, and the tasks they challenged themselves to complete in their first years of treatment. I have asked them to describe living with the aftereffects of neglectful childhoods. Second, I have asked them to describe their processes of healing and recovery. What worked for them, and why?
Therapeutic Tools for Adult Survivors of Neglect
The most important initial undertaking in guided imagery is to help you find a safe space. When you start this process, there is no need to become perfectly relaxed. This is a skill that is developed over time. If your mind wanders away from the visualization, that’s fine. It’s like falling asleep during a massage; your body still benefits from the healing touch.
The following exercises have been used with neglect survivors. They originally appeared in a wonderful book entitled "Mother Wit: A Feminist Guide to Psychic Development" (1981) by Diane Mariechild.
Preview each visualization below, and then download the one(s) you like as an mp3 file for free.
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Jasmin Lee Cori, author of "The Emotionally Absent Mother (2010) and Healing from Trauma (2008)"
"This sensitive portrayal of childhood neglect will be valuable to therapists, especially those who have not been trained in insight-oriented or dynamic psychotherapies. It shows how neglect, in addition to its own long-term impacts, sets the stage for active victimization of children. An experienced clinician, Bennett offers guidance for working compassionately with both neglect and abuse survivors."